Because I want you

02.30 AM, Falköping, Sweden

"Dear diary."

The weekend's been great. Yesterday I went to Jönköping to watch a gig with Sister, and party with them afterwards. I met up with my faitful bass player Johan at the station, and we went to buy some alcohol. We sat down by the shore and got drunk while we waited for the club to open. Johannes, my guitarist, also came by a little later and joined us. Felt good to meet "the band" again, we've had so much fun together and this was no exception. As the alcohol started taking effect, we went on to hide the booze in a trash can so we could get it after the show and continue drinking. I can't remember too much from that moment on, but this is kinda' what happened;

1. went into the club, had another drink.

2. complained about the shitty music to the DJ.

3. complained about all the brats who were there.

4. had another drink.

5. spotted some pretty ladies.

6. saw Jamie and the rest of the band.

7. greeted him and buyed him a beer.

8. waited for Sister to start playing.

9. had another Bloody Mary.

10. watched Sister play. Rocked hard.

11. watched Sister go offstage. Found Jamie.

12. suffered from hearing loss.

13. tried to find our guitarist who had disappeared without a trace.

14. discovered he had been thrown out 'cause he was too drunk.

15. got harassed by a shitload of girls who thought I was Sister's guitarist.

16. took advantage of the situation and had a nice time with one of them in the alley behind the bar

17. went inside, found Jamie, found the basstard

18. went out to the alley again, shared a few lines of speed with Jamie and Johan

19. went inside again, enjoying the good company

20. club closed, went outside.

21. found the band. fetched the alcohol.

22. partied with the band in their van

23. found another party

24. followed the band to the party

25. had some more drinks, sang with Jamie

26. passed out around 6.30 in the morning

27. woke up around 8.30. Headache. Went home.

That's all I can remember, I'm sure a lot more fucked up things happened, as they always seem to do in the company of that band... So as I said, I went back home again, and fell asleep as soon as I got there. I've spent the whole day in bed, feeling hungover, and I'm still not feeling too well... guess I did a little too much speed yesterday. So I'm spending the night watching Sopranos and listening to music... alone... as always.

I feel so fucking lonely. I need someone to share my days with, someone who understands me... and can keep me company through all those lonely nights. Just to be able to sleep without all the nightmares, it would be so great... But no one seems to be interested any longer, I guess I'm getting more and more translucent. Soon they won't see me at all.

I need someone to love.