Sunday, December 2, 2012

Gone but never forgotten

5.34 PM, Boras, Sweden

Today's soundtrack;

Guns N' Roses – Don't Damn Me

"I know you don't want to hear me crying
An I know you don't want to hear me deny
That your satisfaction lies in your illusions
But your delusions are yours an not mine
We take for granted that we know the whole story
We judge a book by it's cover
And read what we want
Between selected lines"

Dear diary,

Just woke up, slept all day long since Jessica and Louis left. They decided to visit me last night after the bars closed, I was a mess by then so I gladly accepted. They spent the whole night here talking, hugging and just messing around, felt really good to get some distraction from my mind trying to kill me. We all slept on my small mattress for a couple of hours, then they got up and left around 9 AM. The best of friends, so glad I have them. Seems like my drummer is gonna start moving in next week, which is great news, it's a tad bit empty here at the moment, echoing through the rooms with no furniture. Also having my doctor's appointment tomorrow, I guess I'll go just to see what they'll say... been having trouble with my heart again lately, hurts like hell when I breathe, so I guess something's up...

The feeling of freedom grows stronger every passing minute. My mind is burning with anger and fury for what that cunt did to me, I'll never be able to forgive her for the deceit and fuckin' lies she were telling me, and if I get the chance I'll spit in her fuckin' face. I'm totally convinced that she had met this dude she's with right now before me - I know for a fact she has - and they started forming a relationship while she was still telling me she loved me, and then it got serious so she had to make an excuse to get rid of me to hook up with that sorry fuck. Right on, girl, nice move. You always had the saying "I'll just let karma fuck you up." written everywhere, but I guess it kicks back. Everyone I talk to say the same thing to me; "I can't believe you stood up with that fake bitch for so long", and that is from the people I once believed were her friends. I guess they can tell from a mile away. Funny how that works, karma... Anyway, good riddance. Now for some coffee and a cigarette. Later.

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